June 9, 2012

Lately, I am.


Lately, I am tired.
Lately, I am disconnected.

Ah, so many things I choose to think about. why did I take in so many responsibilities at one. Some are even very trivial. On that over-achieving pathway again.

It wouldn't be a problem, really, if I had that much more time for the people I love. However, all the pressure seems to be taking me away from the people I love. I have not been contacting my parents or make good connections with people around me. Alhamdulillah for the room mates, or else I'd be a blob of mess sitting alone in my room.

Awefullywritten has been doing fine. Its been having a good push since the start although it has been slowing down since its exam time. Exams has been harsh on me, the criminal paper was killer. Too many things I would like to say but the mind just stopped and corked right there and then. I have been having too much sleep even for my own liking.

And of course, Aimi I am sorry for being a mess and dragged you into this without your consent. If there was one thing I would change, it would be this. I will gladly throw this all away for you. You have been too kind to a person like me and that patience I have never seen in another in my entire life, aside from my mother. I am unkind for destroying a beauty such as yours.

I won't exaggerate and tell you I am in depression. I only feel like I'm entering depression. Like a balloon is about to pop right in my hand. There's a lot more unfortunate people around. Way more unfortunate, I shouldn't complain.

I will remain in my silence.



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